A Turn-around for the Book

I first spotted the figure as he rounded the corner; stocky build and shaven head, slow and deliberate movement, looking very much like someone whose pint you definitely did not spill.  He is crossing the road, looking for traffic but seemingly still focused in my direction.  Maybe he will turn and walk down the road, perhaps he is looking for somebody or he wants directions?  He is getting closer, still walking towards me, close enough now to see the part vacant, part crazed, punch-drunk expression that typifies substance abuse in one form or another.  He bends down, grins a toothless smile and offers an outstretched fist. “You remember me, don’t you?” I reach out and fist-bump, trying desperately to recall any previous encounter. “I was in a bad way, a very bad way”, he continues, addressing me by name so we must have met here before, I hope he is not going to recall an addled version of events where I did something bad or I owe him something….

“Everyone is allowed to have a bad day now and then, it’s how life is.  How are you doing now?” I tried the friendly approach, give him nothing to get wound up over.  “Nobody else would talk to me, but you stopped and listened.  I've got my own place now.  You know, in the centre of London.  I've got a job.  That place is a totally different life.” In all probability I had stopped and spoken to him before; if beggars know you are homeless too they will generally not ask for any money from you, but the first time they meet me I will at least give them time of day.  “There’s not many people I let in my flat,” he continued “Me, my nieces…” The penny dropped – I remembered now the quivering wreck of a man I had met before, screaming, shouting and crying, a man ready to give up on life and turn his back in desperation. “You were the only one who stopped to talk to me, you told me not to give up….”  His voice tailed off as if his mind had suddenly run out of processing power and needed to recharge before he could continue.

“You are looking really well, and it is so good to hear your life has turned around” I interjected, keeping his mood as positive as I could – seeing these streets again could easily bring back bad memories and send him backwards.  “I have got a spare room if you want it, nothing special but you won’t have to sleep here tonight” he blurted unexpectedly.  “I can’t do that,” I replied searching for polite reasons to turn him down without causing offence “there are some things I need to do here.”  In all honesty it was probably for the best – he still has an addiction or two to conquer and that is probably not the best environment for me to be in.  “The offer is always there, just come and find me if you need anything.” He said with a smile as he turned to walk away.  I dare say if I tried hard enough to find him again I probably could; life has an interesting way of making things happen but for me right now I was where I needed to be, I am not quite ready for life’s domestic complications just yet.